Experiencing a breakup often demands the support of loved ones. It can be vital for healing.
When a relationship ends, it’s natural to lean on friends and family. Unfortunately, reactions can vary. Some may focus anger on an ex, which might not be helpful.
In Carolyn Hax’s column dated June 16, 2026, she discusses this dynamic through the lens of a reader’s experience. The reader shared about a long-term, on-and-off relationship. It ended with the boyfriend reacting coldly after being told he was mansplaining.
Instead of discussing the issue, he chose to cut off communication. He expressed that an apology wasn’t sufficient for him. Such responses can complicate the healing process. Support from loved ones should prioritize the individual’s feelings. Rage toward the ex can distract from the emotional needs of the person affected.
“She needed her loved ones to sit with her in the breakup grief – not rage at her cruel ex.”
This quote emphasizes the importance of focusing on comforting the person in pain. A breakup can be distressing, so understanding the emotional journey is key.
For those supporting someone in grief, consider the following:
- Listen actively and empathetically.
- Avoid directing anger toward the ex.
- Encourage expressing emotions honestly.
- Remind them of their strengths and resilience.
These actions can create a supportive environment. It can enable the person to feel understood and cared for. Emotional support plays a fundamental role in recovery.

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